Voiceless Worship and A Healing Miracle

COUNTDOWN TO FEAST ALABANG CENTER OPENING

Friday, July 30, 2010 (9 days to go)

Music Ministry practice. Sharp pain in my throat as I tried to reach a high note. Uh-oh. Not good.

Sunday, Aug. 1, 2010 (7 days to go)

Last day of the South Feast in Cinema 10. Excitement in the whole theater – we’re finally moving after a week’s delay. But my excitement mixed with worry. I hope I can sing at the opening. That spike-haired bug was still frolicking in my throat at worship.

Tuesday, Aug. 3, 2010 (5 days to go)

Off to Divisoria with the other committee members to buy Music Ministry outfits. A hot, tiring day of walking, searching and haggling (a.k.a. harassing store owners to death.) After a quick shower, it was off to the South Feast Council meeting. My cough was having a field day – firecrackers in August.

Thursday, Aug. 5, 2010 (3 days to go)

Spent the whole day looking for South Feast servants’ pictures for the bulletin. I got a headache and was feverish. I missed Music Ministry practice.

Friday, Aug. 6, 2010 (2 days to go)

Second choir practice. I attended even if the infection had turned my voice from Alto 1 to Bass 2. I didn’t want to be clueless about the mechanics on opening day. So I lip synched it.

Saturday, Aug. 7, 2010 (1 day to go)

Jericho march at the center. Dust, dust and more dust greeted us. We must have been a sight. Bro Arun onstage with his guitar and about a hundred servants marching and singing – all wearing masks.

On to Music Ministry practice. Thank God it was just for program flow and blocking.

On to stage décor set-up. Thank God for the help. My Creatives Ministry angels: Jacq, Khaki, Charisse and Ernst who made the stage as dreamy as a wedding gown; Krisanne and Maan with their parents who made the festive balloons for the entrance. And of course, there were our ever-helpful brothers of the Facilities Ministry.

Sunday, Aug. 8, 2010 (D Day!!!)

All I could croak out that morning was a monotone. For the life of me, I couldn’t manage a string of notes that remotely resembled a tune. But I wanted so much to be with the choir in worshipping God on this historic day. So tune or no tune, voice or no voice, I decided to sing praises to my God. It was a worship of the heart.

Already positioned onstage, we witnessed the ribbon-cutting from afar. What a sight to see all our loyal attendees there dressed in their Sunday’s best for the occasion. This is our family celebrating the opening of our new home.

The enthronement of the Bible, the Crucifix and the Blessed Mother was so touching. It moved many people to tears. They were enthroned not just in the altar but in our proudly Catholic hearts.

Bro Arun’s talk was brilliant, hilarious and inspiring, as usual. His talk is the key that keeps people coming back for more. So we were secretly watching the city councilor who pinch-hit for the mayor at the ribbon cutting. Obviously not a charismatic member, she was stick-stiff even when the whole house was already jumping to the great worship. We wanted to see her reaction to the talk. It thawed her out. By the time Bro Arun asked us to sing after his talk, there she was with her hands up in the air like the rest of us.

And the worship! As I said, it was great in the morning session. But the worship in the afternoon was awesome. And that is an understatement. The Holy Spirit was an almost visible presence. He must have decided to sit and stay when Bishop Jesse Mercado blessed the center.

The excitement was as thick as the artificial haze we used for effects. Our beloved leader, Bro Bo Sanchez, was in the house with his family. With the Kerygma 5 Preachers. With our Light of Jesus elders. With the other Feast Builders.

So the spirit-led worship leaders (even those from the morning session joined in) and the whole Music Ministry were inspired to literally rock the stage. And the attendees rocked the rest of the center with singing and dancing. Someone remarked it felt like a KCon high (to the unfamiliar that’s the Kerygma Conference – our annual community gathering). A community elder complained with a big smile we made his knees hurt from dancing.

A POSTCRIPT, A MIRACLE

The following week, fatigue and inhaling more dust in the center during our Tuesday night Council meeting brought on a relapse. By Wednesday I was running a fever. I prayed that it will be gone by Saturday so I can attend to my duties at the Feast on Sunday. But by 10:00 Saturday night, I had a 37.6 temperature. I texted Bro Joey & Sis Myrna, my heads in Events, that I was still sick. I heard the text alert on my phone. Before reading the message, I decided to clear my nose. Pardon the grossness. It seemed all the infection clogged up in my head flowed out. I was surprised because I had spent a week almost bursting my eardrums trying to expel the blockage with no results. This time I breathed freely.

When I read the reply from Bro Joey, I got goose bumps. His text message read: “May the most precious blood of Jesus wash away the cause of your fever. May God heal you right now. In Jesus’ name we pray.” At that moment, I realized the cause of my fever had been washed out. I claimed healing and made a deal with God. If I wake up the next morning without a fever and my chest congestion cleared, I was attending the Feast.

Early Sunday morning after a restful sleep, I checked my temperature. To my disappointment the thermometer read 37.6. But wait, that was my temperature last night! I forgot to shake down the thermometer. I took it again – it was 36.7 this time.

I joyfully proclaimed God’s healing at the Feast. After that, every time, I took my temperature, I would naughtily remind God that I had boasted about His miracle. “Pag nabinat ako, mapapahiya tayo, Lord.” (If I get a relapse, we will be shame-faced, Lord.) I can see Him smiling indulgently as He keeps my temperature below 37.

God is so good. He is worthy of our worship – even if it's a voiceless one.

Of Pink Laptops and Sweet Bell Peppers

I gave myself two merit badges recently. If I could have real badges made, one would have a pink laptop. The other, a plump red bell pepper.

I’m a balanced life advocate. I set goals for my family life, my spiritual & community life, my health, my finances. I even have “pamper me” objectives just to keep me sane and happy. Once in a while, I backslide. Or my resolve gets tested.

PINK LAPTOP

First test – financial literacy.

Basyang destroyed my precious laptop. And I helped. My mechanically-challenged brain did not pause to think that turning on a wet laptop would fry the motherboard. So there I was a blogger with only a pen and a notebook. A Media Ministry head with no access to the internet. Of course I had sons with computers to harass or cajole but it was getting difficult to borrow the computer. After a few days, I was getting scowls or deep sighs.

I scouted around for a laptop. P20,000 plus for one like mine. I was especially tempted when I saw a pretty pink laptop sitting in the store waving at me, “We belong together. Buy me!” But the P23,000 would have put a nasty dent in my savings.

So I dug my heels in and decided to make do with cast-offs. By God’s grace my son’s old computer just needed a new cable. This my other son had plus an extra mouse. My cousin sold me her son’s bulky old monitor. The new things I invested in were a keyboard, a voltage surge protector and a wireless USB dongle. All in all, I spent P2,749.75 for my set. About a tenth of that pretty pink laptop.

Test passed. My badge? The pink laptop still sitting in the computer store. It will sit there until I can really afford it. Or maybe heaven will send me one.

SWEET BELL PEPPER

Second test – health.

I have a treat day every week. I indulge in chocolate (the only health food that I honestly like) and potato chips (no amount of justification will make that a health food –baked not fried vegetable?)

Lately my indulgence expanded from the usual Monday to Tuesday (“I’m stressed – I need a treat”), to Wednesday (“I worked hard – I need a treat”) till I was finding an excuse every day. After listening to “Awaken the Healer in You” series at the South Feast, I had to shake myself out of this guilty pleasure and find something good for my body.

Thank God for TV cooking shows, I stumbled upon a healthy dish which I altered a bit. It’s supposed to be a kebab but we were out of barbecue sticks.

Grilled Tuna Fillet

Tuna Fillet drizzled with olive oil and sprinkled with cumin, cayenne, salt and pepper.

Big & plump red bell pepper, sliced

Broccoli stalks, peeled and cut into sticks (the broccoli head I stir fried in lots of garlic)

Dipping Sauce: unflavored yogurt & lemon.

I grilled the bell pepper and broccoli stalks with the fish for a healthy treat. Junk food bingeing junked. My badge? The red bell pepper. I was surprised I liked it. It was really sweet.

The Heart of the Blog

Early this morning, I received a text from my sister-in-law, Beth. She thanked me for my reflection in Didache today about this blog. Her words: “…very inspiring. I should also make a journal to appreciate (blessings) and have the attitude of gratitude.”

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again – God’s timing is perfect. Last night, I belatedly read an email asking me about the colors the Music Ministry members were supposed to wear last Sunday. The sender said in jest I was too busy writing my blog I forgot to send this out. “Color coding” is one in a myriad of tasks I do for the South Feast. I do this early in the week. Last week it was not done because my laptop was included in Typhoon Basyang’s death toll.

After re-reading my Didache reflection during my prayer time, I realized something. These 3 things – the text, the email, my laptop’s demise – were all timed to remind me that lately I had not been writing about the things I set this blog up for.

So, I return to the heart of the blog. As I write my B.A.G. of Miracles (write – as in pen on paper. Later, I will harass my son to let me use his computer) the words of the song Heart of Worship run through my mind. “I’m coming back to the heart of worship…” I’m coming back to praise God for His many miracles.

LAST WEEK’S SCENARIO:

1. We had two batches of balikbayan relatives to entertain in our maid-less home.
2. It was my younger son’s birthday.
3. Typhoon Basyang dropped in on a clueless Metro Manila. (May bagyo pala!)

My Bs:

1. The blessing of assistance. From my sons who cleaned the lawn and hauled gallons of water. From my cousin, Belle, who cooked kare-kare for the party (a dish I never cooked despite my late husband’s threat not to marry me until I learned how). From my parents who are still actively doing chores at 80. From outside helpers who cleared the rubbish from the storm.
2. The blessing of protection. Our roof hung on for dear life amidst Basyang’s howling winds.
3. The blessing of darkness and light – yes, the power outage was a blessing. No computers to zombify us, no TV to steal our time. My sons and I spent some quiet time sitting on my bed just chatting. And then there was light, in less than 24 hours at that. While most of the metropolis still groped around in darkness, we were pounding madly on our keyboards to beat deadlines. My son for his long delayed thesis and me for the South Feast bulletin.

My As:

1. Fed the multitude plus cooked a special birthday dinner without burning/ breaking/bungling anything
2. My first try with my tita’s caldereta sans tomato sauce recipe was successful. (I think the secret was in the pray-over as it simmered on the stove.)

My Gs:

1. Took time off from cleaning, cooking, serving to watch “Inception” with my two boys on the younger one’s birthday.
2. Made relatives from both sides of my family happy.

There you have it. A full B.A.G. of Miracles.

The Healer Within

HEALING THE BODY

I did a Lady Gaga recently. Nope, not another wacky song and dance number with my costume-happy LOJ community. I tripped and fell and scraped my knee at the mall. I regained my poise only when l saw on TV that I had celebrity company. Lady Gaga tottered on extremely high heels and took a tumble at Heathrow airport in full view of the media. But while only her dignity was hurt, I got a one peso-sized wound on my knee that became extremely painful.

Sometimes, I can’t help but think that the Lord times these things so I can have something to write about. The Sunday right after my less-than-graceful fall was the start of Awaken the Healer in You series at the South Feast. Bro Arun gave the big message for Talk 1, Healer: “God has given you the power to heal yourself.” He also said that the best pharmacy in the world is our body. We have antibodies that can fight off any bacteria and any virus if we have a strong immune system.
Bro Arun Gogna
Observing how my body fought off a possible infection until my wound got devalued to a 10 centavo-sized scab brought home that point. The body has a healer within. But that was merely skin deep. What about more serious ailments? Those too can be healed if we remove spiritual, emotional and chemical toxins within us.

Bro Arun cited the example of Bro Cris Picardal, our Disaster Response Ministry Head. When Bro Cris was diagnosed with a serious ailment, he had an office mate who also had the same illness at about the same time. The other guy went under the knife and got the regular treatment. He passed away after a year. Bro Cris opted for a treatment that hinged on strengthening his immune system. He also continued to faithfully serve in our community. Today, four years after his diagnosis, he exhibits that a strong immune system plus a healthy soul equals a healthy body.

Cris Picardal with daughters Krisanne & Maan following Bro Arun's exhortation to show love to family in Talk 3: Relationships of Awaken the Healer in You series.

HEALING THE NATION

Last Sunday, in Emotions, Talk 2 of the series, the central theme was: “What you feel, you can heal.” Diseases are messages from the soul. We kill the message when we just take pills for the symptoms. We should instead focus on the cause which most of the time can trace its roots to negative emotions. We should not pretend that nothing is happening inside us. It is not good to escape negative emotions because if ignored, they turn into addictions. To avoid emotions killing you, pour your heart out to the Lord. Let it all out. He can take it. He’s a big God, bigger than all our problems combined.

I thought about this as I listened to the forceful, no-nonsense inaugural address of our new president yesterday. P-Noy said, “To those who are talking about reconciliation, if they mean that they would like us to simply forget about the wrongs that they have committed in the past, we have this to say: There can be no reconciliation without justice. Sa paglimot ng pagkakasala, sinisigurado mong mauulit muli ang mga pagkakasalang ito.”

So true. Corrupt public officials who have not been brought to justice have become addicted to money and power. The president’s call for public servants to fight corruption within the bureaucracy and for everyone to walk the straight and narrow (“Tayo na sa tuwid na landas.”) is a call to strengthen our country’s immune system. As citizens we cannot close our eyes to the illness in our society. We have to be the healer within.

*Thanks to IC de Guzman for the South Feast photos

The Year of Living Deliberately

I can’t believe it’s been a year! On June 15, 2009, Bro Arun Gogna, our South Feast builder, invited us over to his house for his birthday dinner cum meeting for the South Feast launch. There were about 26 of us from the Council in attendance then. We surprised him by coming in Indian attire complete with Elmer Glue-d sequins on our foreheads to honor his Bumbay roots.

Last Sunday, June 13, there was a strikingly different celebration for his 40th birthday. Over 1,000 people were on hand at the South Feast to surprise him. The Children’s Ministry came with balloons. There was cake. There were party hats and huge tarps. There were videos featuring his family, friends and South Feast attendees thanking him for his role in the miracles wrought in their lives.

Perfectly timed with the occasion was the last talk of the series A Life of No Regrets: The Joy of Intentional Living. Bro Arun summarized the whole series in two words – LIVE DELIBERATELY. Deliberately make the right choices for a life lived with no regrets…
…spend time with your loved ones
…serve others; help them to grow and become better
…develop your core gift and go out of your comfort zone
…forgive and ask for forgiveness
…refuse to do wrong even if others are doing it
…sacrifice your self for your life mission.

My mind zoomed in on pictures of the past year perfectly framed by this last talk.

Picture Collage# 1: Changed lives and the South Feast Center set to open on our first year anniversary. Framed by the choice to serve and sacrifice for one’s life mission.
Bro Arun tirelessly leading and preaching.
Ministry heads and servants selflessly giving time and talent.
Attendees generously sharing their treasure.

Picture Collage#2: Bro Arun’s birthday surprises, both the touching and the wacky. Framed by the choice to love.

Sis Lallaine (a.k.a. Lois Lallaine) making all the party arrangements and asking everyone to come as Bro Arun’s (a.k.a. Superman) favorite superhero or character from Star Trek, Star Wars and X-men. All accomplished while caring for the sick Helene (a.k.a. Super Girl).

Bro Bo, Sis Marowe, Bene and ministry servants making the effort to film the videos.

Children’s ministers performing the superhuman task of keeping dozens of kids quiet and entertained while waiting for their cue to enter.

Kerygma preachers, their wives and CG mates in costume as superheroes Green Lantern, Krystala, Xavier, Storm, etc. making the long trek to the south and attracting curious stares from motorists in SLEX. Bro Jon Escoto risking neck injury with his Iron (as in plantsa) Man costume.


Becky missing work and a big social event to make the party video and tarps.
Myrna missing meals and sleep while stressing on the builder gifts and the program.
Me dancing to Poker Face at 4:00 in the morning of the party trying to choreograph a short presentation –complete with headphones and light steps to avoid waking my slumbering sons in the next room.

Council members frantically looking for costumes in between their work and ministry duties – digging into piles of ukay-ukay, going to Divisoria to get X-men wigs and Star Wars buns, turning closets inside out to find moldy boots, commissioning their children to make their logos.

Dignity getting kicked out during the dance, scratched by Wolverine’s chopstick claws and slashed by plastic light sabers.

What a fun and meaningful way to cap the year. A year that saw many lives prospered, relationships strengthened, core gifts developed, comfort zones left and courage zones explored. A year of living deliberately.

“Be Mary.”

My schedule has been doubly hectic these past two weeks. Jockeying for prime position in my weekly planner are my work and my service.

My brain has been getting fried with the kind of work I do – not my core gift, not enjoyable but definitely necessary in the bills department.

In my community service, there’s that same jostling going on. The bulletin, requests from other ministries, choir practice, stage décor look like hungry quadruplets crying for milk all at the same time. And silly me, I opened my big mouth that led to another ministry. Even if this will use my core gift and work experience, it still feels like my quads morphed into quints. Just like gremlins that got wet.

At the South Feast last Sunday, our worship leader, Jan Silan, asked us to pause and allow the Lord to speak to us. In the silence, God gently said to me, “Be Mary.”

That was an invitation that called the Martha in me to sit at His feet. And I did. I didn’t sing with the choir even in the afternoon session. I just focused on worshiping the Lord. That was the operative word for the day, FOCUS. The call to be Mary helped me to assess my service. At the May 16 talk, No Fears, Bro Arun said eventually our Courage Zone becomes a Comfort Zone. When that happens, it’s time to move out again. The Secretariat has become my comfort zone – well, to be more precise, it has become a discomfort zone.

It’s time to focus, to delegate, to move. I pray I’ll find someone who will see the Secretariat as her courage zone. It’s time for me to take risks in my core zone.


On the same vein, this reminds me of the original Martha in my family – my Mama. That’s obviously where my Martha genes come from. She celebrated her 80th birthday two weeks ago. At that age, she is still the epitome of Martha – managing our home to make sure our lives are comfortable. But she also takes the time to be Mary, for she sits at the Lord’s feet at mass every single day.

Encountering Jesus in My Service

Jesus Encounter participants with South Feast builder,
Bro Arun Gogna & LOJ-South Feast servants

May 8, 2010! There was a conflict when this was scheduled. I had a previous commitment. But this will be the first ever Jesus Encounter for the South Feast – a rite of passage for faithful attendees into the Light of Jesus Family. I wanted so much to serve. I did the next best thing. I promised to follow right after my other event. I was torn. As Secretariat head, it was my duty to man the registration table early in the morning. Good thing there were people who can cover for me.

The night before the JE, I learned some disturbing news about my other event. I had been praying for this. It was important to me too. But from the very start there was some heaviness in my heart every time I prayed for it. With that news and my family’s warning not to go, I decided to serve in the JE instead.

Funny how the Lord arranges things. He prevented me from going to my event because there were things He needed me for in the JE.

I found out in the morning that the one assigned to the registration had to work overtime and couldn’t make it. The person in charge of the Secretariat in my supposed absence was multi-tasking as emcee. He was already loaded with emcee-related work. The Music Ministry head had an important commitment and couldn’t be there. Our Events Ministry head asked me to coordinate the singers and the lyrics. And then there were other things: singing at the worship, serving food, praying over the participants at the baptism, etc. etc.

(Note to self: never volunteer to pray over at the baptism ever again. My tear ducts are too loose. I cry ahead of the participants especially when they’re people I care for. Embarrassing!)

I’m glad the Lord arranged things the way He did. He allowed me to serve at this historic encounter with such a loving, committed and hard-working team. That’s what’s so great about serving at the South Feast. There are glitches true, as in any event, but we learn our lessons, learn to be more patient and continue loving each other.